Start Fast, Talk Fast

Diving into the tale; talk sounds fast

An Old Hack Novel

I’ve been rereading Calumet “K”, a 1904 yarn by Samuel Merwin and Henry Kitchell Webster. The opening is breathtakingly simple and fast off the marks; here it is:

The contract for the two million bushel grain elevator, Calumet K, had been let to MacBride & Company, of Minneapolis, in January, but the superstructure was not begun until late in May, and at the end of October it was still far from completion. Ill luck had attended Peterson, the constructor, especially since August. MacBride, the head of the firm, disliked unlucky men, and at the end of three months his patience gave out, and he telegraphed Charlie Bannon to leave the job he was completing at Duluth and report at once at the home office.

Rumors of the way things were going at Calumet under the hands of his younger co-laborer had reached Bannon, and he was not greatly surprised when MacBride told him to go to Chicago Sunday night and supersede Peterson.

At ten o’clock Monday morning, Bannon, looking out through the dusty window of the trolley car, caught sight of the elevator, the naked cribbing of its huge bins looming high above the huddled shanties and lumber piles about it. A few minutes later he was walking along a rickety plank sidewalk which seemed to lead in a general direction toward the elevator. The sidewalks at Calumet are at the theoretical grade of the district, that is, about five feet above the actual level of the ground. In winter and spring they are necessary causeways above seas of mud, but in dry weather every one abandons them, to walk straight to his destination over the uninterrupted flats. Bannon set down his hand bag to button his ulster, for the wind was driving clouds of smoke and stinging dust and an occasional grimy snowflake out of the northwest. Then he sprang down from the sidewalk and made his way through the intervening bogs and, heedless of the shouts of the brakemen, over a freight train which was creaking its endless length across his path, to the elevator site.

Here in a bit more than 300 words we get the problem to be solved, and the hero tasked with it. That’s about 1-1/2 pages in the standard manuscript. I note that the problem is what is introduced, not the character of the hero, Charlie Bannon. This is not to be a tale of character, but of events. It will tell of the effort to build that grain elevator on time, before January 1. When that effort succeeds or fails, the tale will be done.

The hero is introduced over the course of a few chapters as he tells various tales of his career. His primary introduction occurs a few pages later, and it is equally swift and sure:

Bannon, who, since the days when he was chief of the wrecking gang on a division of the Grand Trunk, had made a business of rising to emergencies, was obviously the man for the situation. He was worn thin as an old knife-blade, he was just at the end of a piece of work that would have entitled any other man to a vacation; but MacBride made no apologies when he assigned him the new task—“Go down and stop this fiddling around and get the house built. See that it’s handling grain before you come away. If you can’t do it, I’ll come down and do it myself.”

Bannon shook his head dubiously. “Well, I’m not sure—” he began. But MacBride laughed, whereupon Bannon grinned in spite of himself. “All right,” he said.

Outside In

The whole tale is told in the same brusque, almost breathless note. It perfectly captures the race against time that the job entails. I just picked it up and started reading; next thing I knew it was over an hour later and I was more than 1/4 through it.

What can we learn from this?

First, that action takes precedence over everything. By ‘action’ I don’t mean fist fights, races, car chases, or explosions, which is what ‘action’ means today in movies (it wasn’t always so, not even in movies) — I mean activities that advance toward the goal. Here ‘action’ is the opposite of ‘reflection’ and ‘description.’

So if the talesman just tells us ‘what happened’ with as little analysis as he can, he gives us a very fast-moving tale. And we, hearing or reading only of ‘what happened’ are focused on the events, on ‘what happens next?’

Second, dialogue reads faster than narration. There’s a lot more dialogue in the book than narration. The authors might have given us Bannon’s career in terms of narration, but instead they had him tell others in dialogue. Since Bannon is the only one on scene who knows his past, he’s the only one who can tell it; this does bring up the problem of making Bannon seem a bit of a braggart. The authors try to cover this up by having him seem to be complaining most of the times he tells these tales, and by having Bannon the talesman also confine his tales to ‘what happened.’ Here’s an example to give you a taste of how they did it, in which Bannon tells about a little task he was given in between the ‘Duluth job’ he had just about finished, and the Calumet elevator. (My apologies for the ugly word Bannon gives out.)

“Well, the dinner was all right. But I wish you had a bigger bed. I ain’t slept for two nights.”

“What was the matter?”

“I was on the sleeper last night; and I didn’t get in from the Duluth job till seven o’clock Saturday night, and Brown was after me before I’d got my supper. Those fellows at the office wouldn’t let a man sleep at all if they could help it. Here I’d been working like a nigger ’most five months on the Duluth house—and the last three weeks running night shifts and Sundays; didn’t stop to eat, half the time—and what does Brown do but— ‘Well,’ he says, ‘how’re you feeling, Charlie?’ ‘Middling,’ said I. ‘Are you up to a little job tomorrow?’ ‘What’s that?’ I said. ‘Seems to me if I’ve got to go down to the Calumet job Sunday night I might have an hour or so at home.’ ‘Well, Charlie,’ he says, ‘I’m mighty sorry, but you see we’ve been putting in a big rope drive on a water-power plant over at Stillwater. We got the job on the high bid,’ he says, ‘and we agreed to have it running on Monday morning. It’ll play the devil with us if we can’t make good.’ ‘What’s the matter?’ said I. ‘Well,’ he says, ‘Murphy’s had the job and has balled himself up.’”

By this time the two men had their coats on, and were outside the building.

“Let’s see,” said Bannon, “we go this way, don’t we?”

“Yes.”

There was still the light, flying flakes of snow, and the biting wind that came sweeping down from the northwest. The two men crossed the siding, and, picking their way between the freight cars on the Belt Line tracks, followed the path that wound across the stretch of dusty meadow.

“Go ahead,” said Peterson; “you was telling about Murphy.”

“Well, that was the situation. I could see that Brown was up on his hind legs about it, but it made me tired, all the same. Of course the job had to be done, but I wasn’t letting him have any satisfaction. I told him he ought to give it to somebody else, and he handed me a lot of stuff about my experience. Finally I said: ‘You come around in the morning, Mr. Brown. I ain’t had any sleep to speak of for three weeks. I lost thirty-two pounds,’ I said, ‘and I ain’t going to be bothered tonight.’ Well, sir, he kind of shook his head, but he went away, and I got to thinking about it. Long about half-past seven I went down and got a time-table. There was a train to Stillwater at eight-forty-two.”

“That night?”

“Sure. I went over to the shops with an express wagon and got a thousand feet of rope—had it in two coils so I could handle it—and just made the train. It was a mean night. There was some rain when I started, but you ought to have seen it when I got to Stillwater—it was coming down in layers, and mud that sucked your feet down halfway to your knees. There wasn’t a wagon anywhere around the station, and the agent wouldn’t lift a finger. It was blind dark. I walked off the end of the platform, and went plump into a mudhole. I waded up as far as the street crossing, where there was an electric light, and ran across a big lumber yard, and hung around until I found the night watchman. He was pretty near as mean as the station agent, but he finally let me have a wheelbarrow for half a dollar, and told me how to get to the job.

“He called it fifty rods, but it was a clean mile if it was a step, and most of the way down the track, I wheeled her back to the station, got the rope, and started out. Did you ever try to shove two five hundred foot coils over a mile of crossties? Well, that’s what I did. I scraped off as much mud as I could, so I could lift my feet, and bumped over those ties till I thought the teeth were going to be jarred clean out of me. After I got off the track there was a stretch of mud that left the road by the station up on dry land.

“There was a fool of a night watchman at the power plant—I reckon he thought I was going to steal the turbines, but he finally let me in, and I set him to starting up the power while I cleaned up Murphy’s job and put in the new rope.”

“All by yourself?” asked Peterson.

“Sure thing. Then I got her going and she worked smooth as grease. When we shut down and I came up to wash my hands, it was five minutes of three. I said, ‘Is there a train back to Minneapolis before very long?’ ‘Yes,’ says the watchman, ‘the fast freight goes through a little after three.’ ‘How much after?’ I said. ‘Oh,’ he says, ‘I couldn’t say exactly. Five or eight minutes, I guess.’ I asked when the next train went, and he said there wasn’t a regular passenger till six-fifty-five. Well, sir, maybe you think I was going to wait four hours in that hole! I went out of that building to beat the limited—never thought of the wheelbarrow till I was halfway to the station. And there was some of the liveliest stepping you ever saw. Couldn’t see a thing except the light on the rails from the arc lamp up by the station. I got about halfway there—running along between the rails— and banged into a switch—knocked me seven ways for Sunday. Lost my hat picking myself up, and couldn’t stop to find it.”

Peterson turned in toward one of a long row of square frame houses.

“Here we are,” he said. As they went up the stairs he asked: “Did you make the train?”

“Caught the caboose just as she was swinging out. They dumped me out in the freight yards, and I didn’t get home till ’most five o’clock. I went right to bed, and along about eight o’clock Brown came in and woke me up. He was feeling pretty nervous. ‘Say, Charlie,’ he said, ‘ain’t it time for you to be starting?’ ‘Where to?’ said I. ‘Over to Stillwater,’ he said. ‘There ain’t any getting out of it. That drive’s got to be running tomorrow.’ ‘That’s all right,’ said I, ‘but I’d like to know if I can’t have one day’s rest between jobs—Sunday, too. And I lost thirty-two pounds.’ Well, sir, he didn’t know whether to get hot or not. I guess he thought himself they were kind of rubbing it in. ‘Look here,’ he said, ‘are you going to Stillwater, or ain’t you?’ ‘No,’ said I, ‘I ain’t. Not for a hundred rope drives.’ Well, he just got up and took his hat and started out. ‘Mr. Brown,’ I said, when he was opening the door, ‘I lost my hat down at Stillwater last night. I reckon the office ought to stand for it.’ He turned around and looked queer, and then he grinned. ‘So you went over?’ he said. ‘I reckon I did,’ said I. ‘What kind of a hat did you lose?’ he asked, and he grinned again. ‘I guess it was a silk one, wasn’t it?’ ‘Yes,’ said I, ‘a silk hat—something about eight dollars.’”

“Did he mean he’d give you a silk hat?” asked Peterson.

“Couldn’t say.”

I’ve taken the text from the http://www.gutenberg.org edition, available online at http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/18154

(Composed on keyboard Sunday, May 4, 2008)